Abrosexuality is a sexual orientation where a person’s attraction to others changes over time. This can depend on the gender they find attractive, how strong their attraction is, or sometimes not feeling any attraction (asexuality) for a period of time. Shifts in attraction and sexual orientation can happen slowly or quickly and can vary from person to person.
When it comes to identifying sexuality, it’s sometimes helpful to think of sexuality on a spectrum instead of defined categories. Sexual identities and orientations are complex and sometimes hard to classify. Using broad terms to describe sexual orientation can be confusing, misleading, or inaccurate
This spectrum helps describe sexual identity and orientation, and explains how sexual expression can be fluid. It’s also helpful for mental health professionals who need to explain gender and sexuality to clients or family members.
It can be particularly useful to think of sexual orientation on a spectrum when considering abrosexuality. Those who identify as abrosexual often view sexuality as fluid and fluctuate between different sexual orientations. However, it’s not the same as people who are bisexual, attraction to men and women, or pansexual, attraction to all genders.
Abrosexuality is a relatively new term used to describe someone who can’t easily define their sexuality or sexual orientation by other terms like pansexuality, bisexuality, and asexuality.
Though everyone may experience abrosexuality differently, some potential signs you may identify as abrosexual include:
- Fluctuating attraction: Abrosexuality is characterized by noticeable changes in sexuality or attraction over time, sometimes even within short periods of time. You may be attracted to men sometimes and attracted to women other times.
- Uncertainty about sexuality: Early on, you may feel uncertain or confused about your sexuality because of how fluid and unpredictable your attraction may feel. Once you see that it follows a pattern, the possibility of abrosexuality becomes clearer.
- Other labels are too confining: People who identify with abrosexuality often feel that other definitions like bisexuality and pansexuality are too restrictive to describe them because of how their attraction changes.
- May have periods of asexuality: Sometimes people who identify with abrosexuality will go through periods in their life where they aren’t sexually attracted to anyone. This doesn’t happen with everyone, but it’s a common part of abrosexuality.
It can be challenging to know if you identify as abrosexual since it isn’t a well-known orientation, and it can look different for every person. The defining characteristic of abrosexuality is the fluidity of attraction, which includes consistent, noticeable shifts in attraction over time.
If you experience significant fluctuations in your sexual attraction over time, where you feel attracted to different genders or go through periods with no sexual attraction at all, you may identify as abrosexual. This fluidity may also change within days, weeks, or longer. The key is that your attraction levels and gender focus can change considerably from time to time.
These changes may cause people to feel like they’re coming out often. They may also feel like they have to explain their sexuality to people repeatedly for them to understand these shifts.
Sexual identity and sexual attraction can be confusing. It can be helpful to seek out others who understand your experiences and can also share their own. Some organizations that can offer support include:
- CenterLink: A website where you can search your state to find local LGBTQ+ community centers and programming.
- Equality Federation: A website with a directory of statewide LGBTQ+ organizations offering resources, programming, and support.
- The Trevor Project: An organization that offers support to and resources for the LGBTQ+ community.
- The Audre Lorde Project: Based in New York City, this organization promotes social justice for the LGBTQIA+ community.
- LGBT National Help Center: The Help Center has multiple hotlines for various populations, including youth, seniors, and people coming out. Their contact page shares specific hotline information.
Being abrosexual and being in a committed relationship can be a challenge, especially if your sexual attraction changes frequently. The key is to be open and honest from the beginning about your sexuality to avoid misunderstandings, confusion, and hurt feelings.
For partners who aren’t abrosexual, the changes in attraction may be hard to understand. Good communication is key and will allow you to build trust, empathize with one another, resolve conflicts, and express your needs.
People who are abrosexual may also avoid committed relationships because of the possibility of fading attraction. Their sexuality has the potential to create more conflict and misunderstandings as their attraction changes or during periods when they feel more asexual. However, avoiding relationships may not be the best approach.
Research suggests that exploring romantic and sexual feelings through dating and relationships is an important part of forming your identity, as long as it’s done with care.
Abrosexuality is a sexual orientation where a person’s attraction to others is more fluid and can vary from person to person. People who identify as abrosexual may change the gender they find attractive or may have times when they aren’t attracted to anyone.
This type of sexual orientation isn’t well-known, so there isn’t a lot of available information about it. People can find support by reaching out to organizations like The Trevor Project or using a website like CenterLink to find community centers and programming in their area.
